Oh the skills I have learned being a Mom.
I can now...
- pick a sliver out of the hand of a child who is screaming as though I am trying to cut off his ears.
- smell withheld poop from across the room
- carry 3 plates plus utensils while adding food to the plates from a buffet table
- fold laundry, talk on the phone and glare at the children to stop whatever it is that they are doing wrong.
- find lost shoes in a hay field.
- take close up pictures of a grasshopper laying eggs
- get up, showered, dressed and make a cup of coffee in less then 10 minutes
- tell when my child is lying to me
- have the courage to admit that I make mistakes as a parent.
- drive the car, yell at the kids and carry on a conversation with my husband.
- entertain bored kids with a few napkins, a pen and straw wrapper.
- make a good meal out of 2 cans of chickpeas, an onion, rice, lemon juice, cumin and curry powder
- patch drywall
- teach other people new skills ( read teach kids to do all the household chores I hate)
and last but not least
- I can smell a wet bed from 3 rooms away.
No one ever told me about all the things I would learn, to bad none of them are really skills I could use to get a job doing anything other than being a parent (not that I want a job or anything).